Posted at: 03/30/2010 2:51 PM
Updated at: 12/04/2013 7:30 AM
I can’t take care of my mother any more. I’m ready to have a nervous breakdown. My doctor is worried about me. My mother calls me in the middle of the night all confused and I get out of bed and go to her house. Then she calls me ten times a day at work. My supervisor is trying to be understanding, but she is starting to make comments. I’m not sleeping, I’m not eating right and I cry a lot. I can’t do it anymore. I love my mother but this is just too much. We can’t afford Assisted Living and I think she needs a nursing home anyway but my mother starts crying hysterically if I mention it. I’m a wreck. I don’t want to send her to a home, but what do I do? My girlfriend said I should take her to the hospital and let them deal with it. That doesn’t seem right to me. I hope you can help me. Please.
You need a formal assessment of your mother; her health and level of care needs with consideration to whether she might have any improvements in either. If she is alone at night and confused, she may require all night supervision. (Not necessarily you.)
Next, you need a Geriatric Care Manager to explain all the options.
You might need an Elder Law Attorney to explain Medicaid law and help with that planning.
In short, you need help. You stated that finances are tight. Reach out to Catholic Family Services, Jewish Family Services or Lifespan for services within your budget. Place the call today. You’ll be glad you did. The qualified advocates from any of these services will walk you through each step.
Good luck. Write me back with a progress report.