Ask Jennifer: Week ending 1/18

Posted at: 07/18/2008 3:32 PM
Updated at: 01/12/2015 6:53 AM

Dear Jennifer,

I am taking care of my mother and father as well as my husband’s mother. I help my daughter with her four kids, one of them has spina bifida. I’m running from morning to night. Now I’m having my own heart problems. My doctor said I have to stop. How can I possibly do that? Too many people depend on me and we could never afford to pay someone to do everything I do. I can’t be the only one. How do other people do this? My girlfriend said I should write you. Do you have any ideas for me?

Dear Margie,
You, my friend, are over-doing. You are a nurturer. You say yes to everyone. You like to help. When your family needed more, you gave it. Now your health is suffering. I think it safe to say the two are related. It’s also safe to say that your family depends on you to the point that you are wondering how you can fix this. Where is the rest of your family? What are they doing to fix this? I suspect they aren’t or you wouldn’t need me. I will stick my neck out and say you find it very hard to say “No.” It is time for you to step back; your doctor said as much and you need to listen. But what about the family who needs you? It is time for someone else to take the reins. See today’s article for more.